Don’t make assumptions



In the last blog post I talked about the Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz.

I was working with “Don’t make assumptions.”

I thought one day would do it. HA!  Two weeks later and I find daily how many times I assume.

When someone doesn’t respond to my text message.

When someone calls me and the message doesn’t make sense to me.

When a client looks at me a certain way.

When my dog looks at me a certain way!

GEEZ! When the dog gets involved in my messed up thinking I know I am in trouble.

So, I have worked hard to stop assuming. I have asked more questions and have actually outed some of my assumptions. I have communicated even when it was easier to just assume and go on my merry way.

This has led to a certain kind of vulnerability that can be scary but also enlivening.

I have felt more engaged in my life. I have noticed more. I have felt more. I have actually breathed more. It is amazing how much we all tend to hold our breath!

I even think the dog is looking at me differently!

How did you do?

Please feel free to get in touch and share your own stories.

P.S. I could not resist putting in a picture of our beautiful Delaware River. When all else fails, I hit the water!


The Four Agreements

  1. Be Impeccable with your words

  2. Don’t take anything personally

  3. Don’t make assumptions

  4. Always do your best


The four agreements are from Don Miguel Ruiz and I have them posted on the side of my refrigerator. I read them every day.

How many days do I actually live them? You know how you can say something over and over again, have it totally memorized (any other Catholics out there?), and still living it daily eludes you?

Like the Ten Commandments (OK, I already mentioned the Catholic thing!), these life tenets can just become nice fluff for your internal landscape, or something to pull out in conversation to make us look better than we are.

Today’s challenge: pick one of the above and do it all day.

Get in touch and let me know how it goes, what you experienced, what you noticed. It is so powerful to share the process with one another. I promise to do the same. I will post again and let you know how I lived into “Don’t make assumptions.”

I think I might need more than one day though.